Home-study Update #2

       We are two-thirds of the way through our Home-study interviews!    Our first interview was on July 9th, and has been the longest one so far.  This interview included all of our family for a short part of it and just we parents for the rest of the 3-1/2 hours.  It also included giving our social worker a tour of our home.  We had a lot of questions about how this might work but were pleasantly surprised to see that the home "inspection" was not a rigid, white glove inspection of every aspect of our home, but more like a guided tour for him to see the layout of it.  Information discussed for our first meeting included such things as what led us to adopt, current children's personalities, current children's view of the upcoming adoption, and reviewing paperwork that was sent in previous to our meeting. 

       Our second interview was on July 24th and only included the parents.  Since we had to drive a little more than an hour from our home to meet our social worker, it was a great time to get a sitter to leave the kiddos with and have some time together during the drive. We met at a library.  The first part of this time was spent with all three of us talking together, then we had some separate conversations with our social worker for about 30 minutes each.  Some information discussed in this interview included childhood, our relationship with extended family, getting to know a more about our personalities and interests, our marriage, future goals, and areas of strengths and weaknesses for both of us.  Though we have heard that some of these interviews are really invasive in the information they ask, neither of us have felt that way with either of the two meetings we have had.  Our third and final interview is scheduled for next week, and we should have a written Home-study report ready to go within a few days after that.  We are excited about the steps we have been able to take in the last month to make this adoption journey a reality.  Thanks for following along!

P.S.  Our blog has a new look! Tell us what you think about it in the comments below.

Beginning the Interviews

         Finally! All of the paperwork and the fee for the Homestudy* is in, and we have the green light to continue with the second and last portion of the homestudy process. We will have three interviews with our social worker along with some online educational training to complete the Homestudy. Our first interview is scheduled for next week, and we are looking forward to completing this part of the adoption process.  Getting this far has taken much longer than we originally hoped, but its completion will be a big step in moving forward.

       Thanks to those who have taken the time to ask us how things are going, even when we have had little to say except "still working on paperwork".  Just knowing that you care enough to ask about it is a big encouragement! If you are a regular reader (or even if you're not), please comment on our blog.  We love to hear from those who are following our journey and appreciate hearing from you there too!




 *The purpose behind the homestudy is to be sure that you meet the requirements for adoption and to help prepare us to parent the adopted child. There are two basic parts to the homestudy: the paperwork and the face to face interviews with your social worker.  Each agency chooses in which order they want to complete it, with some gathering all the required documents first and others doing the interview process and then gathering paperwork.  With our agency, we turn in all of the papers, documents, and even some questions we have for them, first and then proceed to the interviews.  The purpose of the interview part of the homestudy is for them to get to know us so the best child match  for our family (and the child) can be made.
       

Video Update on Adoption Process

I just realized how often I said the word "paperwork" in this video!

Good News!

     It has been several weeks since we updated our readers on our adoption.  These last weeks have been a combination of waiting and waiting...and, you guessed it... more waiting to secure a home study agency.

     The good news is...we are finally making some progress with our Home Study! :)  As previously posted, we thought that we were going to be able to go ahead with the second home study agency. Unfortunately, that agency also fell through for us, but it appears that the third agency we have contacted will be the one we will use.  Home Study agency number three has accepted our application, and they are now waiting on us to gather all of paperwork - including, but not limited to, marriage and birth certificates, doctor's health forms for all members of the family, background checks, and autobiographies to send in to them.  Once we have sent the requested paperwork in, we will begin the face to face interviews with the social worker.  We hope to have all the paperwork sent in and ready to go by mid-April.  The Home Study process is likely to go on through the month of June before its completion but will be a major step forward in completing the entire adoption process. 

     While we were waiting to get our home study agency, we did begin doing some of the reading that is required by our placement agency.  There are several hours worth of education that we have to complete as part of the adoption process, including some reading about the history and people of the country (Hungary) from where we are pursing the adoption.

      We will keep you posted on how things are going.  Thanks for following along with us as we travel "Our Road To Adoption".

Request For Prayer

My wife and I are learning that there is nothing easy about the adoption process.  There are days when we are overwhelmed with the immensity of the process.  Other days, we are asked for an update, but are unable to give one other than that we are just "waiting".

We have been waiting for almost three weeks now to hear back from a Homestudy agency regarding their willingness to do our homestudy.  Today, I heard from our Placement agency, that the Homestudy agency had contacted them with concerns about our income not being sufficient.  Arghhhhh!!!!  Our Placement agency, Lifeline Children Services, feels that our income is sufficient and is going to bat for us with the homestudy agency.  Please pray about this situation.  We cannot move forward until our homestudy is complete.

On another note, the reason Lifeline cannot do our homestudy is because they are not licensed in North Carolina...yet.  They are working hard to get an office licensed in our State and have hired a director already.  They are saying it will be soon.  We just don't know when "soon" will be!  Please pray about this as well, because if this were to happen in the next could of months, we would possibly be able to have them do our homestudy rather than a third party agency!

I do not know which way God will work this out.  I do not have the ability to control my income at this point, so it will just have to be enough.  I also know that there are other families with income challenges that have successfully completed the adoption process.  We would greatly appreciate your prayers for this hurtle.  In case I have been a little unclear, the prayer needs are.

1. A way to increase our income.
2. Final approval from Amazing Grace Adoption regarding our Homestudy
3. The quick licensing of Lifeline for work in North Carolina.

If you have any questions or comments of encouragement, feel free to email us or leave a comment on the blog.  Thanks for all those who have offered support so far.  If you are interested in helping in a financial way, view our Ways You Can Help page.

Facing The Giants of Adoption

We are learning that there are giants along the path to adoption.  The largest one so far has been the financial one, but we are seeing him toppled, little by little. More recently the giant has come in the form of pressure to conform.  Let me explain.

As we have been trying to schedule our home study we were referred to a specific organization in North Carolina.  Our placement agency, as you may know, is in Alabama and cannot do our home study.  I contacted the agency and had a very nice talk with the social worker who would be doing the home study.  She knew our placement agency well, and was excited to help us.  She emailed us some basic information to look over and sign and return.  Wonderful!

Then we received the information.  It all looked very standard, until my wife pointed out a certain paragraph in the client agreement form.  This paragraph included some language specific to discipline in our home.  I won't go into more detail then that, but it was worded in such a way that it made us quite uncomfortable.  Immediately the giant poked his ugly head into the room.  I began to worry. "What if this is the law?  What if we have to sign this in order to adopt?"  These questions and more were swirling around as the giant danced through our living room.

I contacted our placement agency and asked what we should do. I asked if the paragraph was standard and if it was part of the Hague Convention.  They responded that the language in that paragraph was certainly not Hague language and that we should contact the home study agency and ask whether this part of the agreement was mandatory in order for them to do our home study.  I did...it was. In fact, the lady gave me the impression that if I held my ground on my beliefs I would very likely be denied the adoption by Hungary. That giant sure did look taller than before.  I was told that most people just sign the document even if they don't intend to comply.  I call that lying.  I don't believe God would be honored by doing that.  However, if others had done it...maybe this was the accepted practice.  I couldn't see how.  There must be another way.

My wife and I took the matter to the Lord in prayer.  Yesterday, Lifeline contacted me with the information for another placement agency in NC.  This agency is a Christian agency, licensed to do home studies, and is Hague certified.  I called them.  They assured me they had no such clause, and that as a Christian agency, they fully supported our beliefs.  I will withhold the name of the agency for the time being since we still must be formally approved by them before starting the home study process.  I hung up the phone while driving home, rolled down the window, and threw the giant out.  He fit easily out the window, since he was now no more than a midget!

Why am I sharing this?  What if something still goes wrong?  No doubt something will.  There are giants all throughout this land.  As a Christian, I believe the God that loves the orphans and has commanded us to love and take care of them as well, will take care of any giants that happen to show up.  I just wanted to encourage those of you who may be watching our journey, and considering adoption yourself, but are afraid.  Don't be afraid.  Come on in...the water's fine.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers in the months ahead.  Thanks!

The Dreaded Home Study!

Probably the part most people dread about adoption is the Home Study.  Even those words strike dread into the hearts of most people.  I guess the words conjure up images of white glove wearing Gestapo agents carrying Sherlock Holmes's magnifying glass while examining your home for any trace of dirt, and digging through your life just looking for a reason to disqualify you!  Even though this perception is not the reality, there is still some nervousness about the process.

Truthfully, my wife and I are not overly excited about this part of the process.  My wife especially is a very private person, so even blogging about this process is out of the box for her!  We would covet your thoughts and prayers as we go through the process of choosing our Home Study agency.  Here is how it works for us.

Since our placement agency is in a different state, we need to have a Home Study agency licensed in North Carolina to perform this service.  Lifeline (our placement agency) has recommended an agency in North Carolina and we are currently having some discussions with them do determine if they are the ones we will use.  The choice of the Home Study agency is very important, because these people will be in your life for the next few months to a year or more, helping you to get approved.  You need to feel comfortable with the people for sure!

Right now we are looking to use Carolina Adoption Services.  If you are a "local" and know of another good Christian agency that does Home Studies, please let us know as soon as you can.  We would like to move forward as quickly as is prudent because this part of the process can last at least four months.

Please pray for us as we continue.  I am so excited about what God is doing and how He has provided thus far.  I know that He will need to do a miracle before we are done, but I believe He will!  If I can answer any questions, I would be happy to do so.  Please leave a comment below and let us know you are reading this blog.  We have dozens of visitors a day, and we would love to hear from you.

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